Our baby fish finally learns to swim

My beautiful 10 ½ month old son had his first official swimming lesson today. What a thrill! Everyone knows that he is a water fanatic – he has loved the water SINCE DAY 1. He loves the bath, any type of running water (he has been taking showers with me since he was 2 months old ), the ocean – he used to fall asleep as soon as I got close to the shore…. I took him in a pool for the first time when he was 4 months old and he was indescribably happy (he was so calm and peaceful – he was mesmerized)..
All of this to say is that the swim lessons were long overdue! But 10 ½ months isn’t exactly late in the game, is it??!! So, today, we put “swimmers” on his little body and drove him to the Lenny Krazelberg Swim school at the JCC in LA. The folks there COULD NOT HAVE BEEN FRIENDLIER – seriously, they made us feel welcome and comfortable immediately and THAT set the tone for the day.

We quickly stripped and jumped into the pool to join the class that had just started! The scene was hilarious – actually.. It was me (6’3” LARGE African American man) along with three mothers and their babies and the teacher. We sang songs and let our babies get comfortable. Then, without warning, came the moment of truth – the instructor stopped the class and announced that it was time for humpty dumpty to fall – YES, we needed to “dunk” our babies under water. On the count of three, we all “blew” on our babies’ faces and dunked them under the water. Our son LOVED IT – he went under and came up with his eyes wide open and smiling! WOW!

OK, so here is one area where daddies may be better suited for “action” than mommies.. I didn’t get a sick feeling when I submerged my tiny little son in chlorine filled water (I wonder if my wife would have been able to do this without crying)… Next up, we were supposed to sit our babies on the edge of the pool and sing the humpty dumpty song and when we got to the part where humpty takes a great fall, we were supposed to pull our babies into the water, blow on their faces and then ease their heads under water. Well, that is nice in theory but our fish-baby kept trying to dive in – I couldn’t get through the song because I had to try to keep our baby from pushing me away to make room for him in the water.. Finally, after a few attempts, I was able to get through the song and partially dunk him (he kept arching his back). The very cool swim instructor took him and did it for me – HE LOVED IT..

I wonder what would have happened if I had just let him go? Would he have worked his way back to the surface?

Finally, one proud father note… our son was the star of the class AGAIN – every time we go to a class, he shines. He loves other babies and he is so easy going that folks can’t stop talking about him – SERIOUSLY!( there are times when it is a little embarrassing). I hope that he continues to love being around other folks and I hope that we continue to do things to nurture his amazing spirit.

My one concern – I worry that Lenny Krazelberg will see Cole in the pool and bar him from his school because he is going to be worried about his records being broken J

A boy and his dog

Every boy should grow up with a dog! Throughout my childhood, we always had a dog in the house. However, I never felt like our dogs were MY dogs. Sure, I was responsible for cleaning up after the dogs and walking them occasionally BUT the dogs ALWAYS loved my mom (she has a great voice for babies and dogs AND she fed the entire family – including the dog!!) and saw my dad as the alpha male. I never got to have a loyal friend that I always dreamt about.

My wife also LOVES dogs. And, for her, the bigger the dog, the better (which is funny because she is only 5’2”). And, while she grew up with dogs too, I think her experience was very similar to mine. However, as an adult, she and her sister had a dog - Hoover – who was her buddy, companion, running/riding partner, foot/bed-warmer, garbage disposal, sounding board, and loyal member of her family. Sadly, they had to put Hoover to sleep three years ago. My wife has healed from that loss and she is ready to add a four – legged member to our family.

I hope that our son will grow up loving dogs like we do! If he doesn’t then he doesn’t but all indications are that he does – HE ABSOLUTELY LOSES HIS MIND WHEN HE SEES THEM ON THE STREET (he lets out a high pitch squeal when he sees them and don’t let one come up to him …. J- it’s like Mardi Gras ). It makes me laugh and smile every time I see him around dogs!

I am not sure I can articulate anything new about why a boy (child) should grow up with dogs but here is why it is important to us. First, he may be an only child (an opportunity cost of having a child at 40) so I hope that having a dog will teach him to think about something else other than himself. I hope that taking care of a dog will teach him to be caring. I hope that, by caring for a living being, he will learn to be responsible, empathetic and nurturing. I hope that he will see his dog as his best buddy and he will look back on his childhood experiences with his dog and smile – they will discover new worlds, swim, camp in the yard, dig holes, keep each other from being bored, spend rainy days together, and even sit in “time out” together. I hope they sleep together. In short, I hope he gets to experience all of the wonderful things that dogs bring to peoples’ lives.

So, the logical question is “why don’t we have a dog?” Short answer – timing and space. We thought about getting a dog before he was born but we decided that we didn’t know exactly what we were getting into so we didn’t want to put ourselves in a situation where our dog would not be getting the attention he deserved. Anyway, we are also STUCK in LA and our space is limited and that would not be fair to the big dog my wife wants. Finally, we decided it might make a little more sense to wait until our son is a little older and he can be a much more active part of the dog’s life.

Any thoughts? Suggestions?

A special gift!

OK- this is what it is – a bragging session about my son.

My son turned 10 months old yesterday and I wanted to take a moment out to reflect on how special he really is – I don’t often brag about him because I think his spirit and beauty speak louder than I ever could.

I told my wife that I knew he was special while he was still in her belly – I told her that we would get stopped in the street daily and guess what???? I know that he is a beautiful boy and there is a segment of people who only notice that about him BUT there is another group of people (the majority of folks) who notice that other quality about him – that something special!!
From day 1 – literally- everyone has said that he seems like he has “been here before” – he has always had piercing/knowing eyes and he is always watching and smiling. He laughs constantly and RARELY cries (seriously). He is smart and he is engaging – he lets anyone hold him and he loves to flirt with everyone. Lately, he has discovered DOGS and he lets out the most adorable squeal when he sees one!

I love this child more than I ever thought I could love anyone – and I love openly and honestly…He makes me laugh and cry almost daily. I want to be with him all of the time. I fall in love with him all over every day.

He is a funny boy – he loves to “jump” and he has been trying to walk since he got here (people used to freak out when they’d see this tiny little baby with a full head of hair trying to walk – no he isn’t a circus freak). We took him to a class at Gymboree the other day and he was the only “verbal” (read screaming and squealing) child in the room and every time he locked onto another baby, he’d pull himself up and start “walking” towards them – THEN, without warning, he’d start jumping – it is the funniest thing ever!

With the kind of love and admiration I have for him, of course, come a lot of questions. First, how do I nurture his gifts? How do I “get out of his way” and let him become the person he is meant to be? I know every person believes that their child can change the world – I KNOW HE WILL. I am constantly working on myself so that I am ready to be the best father I can be. For now, I have taken the advice of friends and I spend lots of time on the floor with him. I watch him and try to see the world through his eyes - it is still a beautiful and amazing place from down there! :)

Any advice?